…”and if you look to your left, ladies and gentlemen, you might catch a glimpse of the lesser-spotted cave ettin in his natural habitat. Please remember to keep your hands inside the cart – the goblins who live nearby consider human fingers to be a delicacy. And, as we round the next bend, you might want to raise those commemorative shields that you bought in the gift shop, just in case the harpies are feeling frisky today…”

Today, you will find gateways to various sites of interest, wonder, and death – sorry, who said death? I didn’t say death. It must have been you. Ahem. Death! The very idea. What will they think of next? Insurance?

Sites of wonder and interest! You’ll find them at the House of Commons, north of the Britain moongate. Gates to the HoC will pop up at major banks and teleport hubs an hour before the tour begins. Thank you, and please remember to tip your tour guide.